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15 Important Things To Do If You’re A Single Mom
If you are wondering about 15 things every single mom should do, this post will tell you everything! Keep reading if you would like to know some awesome suggestions to help you in your single parenting journey.
This is a new chapter of life for you. While not easy and without some bumps, you will get through this! Here are some things to help you on your new journey!
Tips Every Single Mom Should Focus On If Newly Divorced
Tip #1: Use A Shared Calendar.
Shared calendars allow you to add co-parenting activities and events and have the other person see updates in real time. The other person can also add to the calendar which provides an added benefit and ease of use. With a shared calendar you can easily keep track of kid’s doctor appointments, sporting events, school functions and more.
Here are some of the shared calendar apps we love:
Tip #2: Budget.
Take care of your family financially by budgeting accordingly. Figure out what you make, add any child support money in there, and find out what your expenses are for each month. In addition, you can easily pay child support online or track child expenses using free apps such as DComply.
The leftovers (if there are any), can be saved or turned into something fun. Definitely save money, if you ever get the chance. But, also, don’t forget to take a little bit for something fun once in a while, if possible.
Tip #3: Manage Finances And Expenses
Tracking shared expenses and dealing with financial burden can become more difficult post divorce. But there are so many helpful tools on the market to help you with co-parenting and your new life as a single mama.
Making it a priority to manage your finances a little better is a great start and will lead to a less stressful environment for both you and your child. Using some of the helpful apps on the market will make the process much easier too.
Our favorite app to manage co-parenting expenses is the DComply co-parenting app. DComply allows you and your co-parent to keep track of payments and expenses easily and for free. There are added features with the paid version of the app, but you can always try it out first before you commit! Download it for iPhone here or for Android here.
Tip #4: Create A Support System.
Creating a support system is an important thing to do as a single mom. Your support system could be family, friends, neighbors, and even the teachers at your children’s daycare. Teachers can be a wealth of information for the different ages of your children, so don’t overlook using them as a resource.
Open up and talk to these people. You’ll be surprised and encouraged by their willingness to support you. Yes, you may have to ask for help, but guess what? That’s ok. It will only get better the more you are willing to do what it takes to get the support you need.
Seeing a therapist is another helpful thing you can do. Do it with or without your co-parent. We know it will help you big time!
Tip #5: Join A Support Group.
Similar to creating a support system, you can join a support group as well. Look on sites such as Facebook, or just google one near you. This will provide you with mental support and even a place to ask questions and get feedback.
If you are newly divorced, joining a support group can be hugely beneficial. In addition, you can read this blog post on tips for newly divorced parents. We’re sure that will help too!
Great places to find support groups include:
Tip #6: Make An Emergency Plan.
What if your car breaks down on your way to get your kids? What if your kids get sick at school? What if your washer finally breaks beyond repair? While it is not fun to think of these types of things, it is a good idea to let them cross your mind long enough to make a plan for each of the scenarios (as well as anymore you can think of), along with a second back-up plan, just in case.
Tip #7: Create A Schedule For You And The Kids.
Creating a schedule for you and your kids will help set you up for success. Getting on a schedule will give your kids and yourself a feeling of stability that will enhance other aspects of your life as well.
Benefits of adding structure through a schedule:
- Feeling of stability
- Sense of purpose
- Higher levels of satisfaction in day to day life
- Less stress
At first, you may have to work on hard on the schedule to keep it going. After a while, though, it will become second nature. It will be predictable and consistent, which children THRIVE on- and quite honestly, you will benefit from this, too.
TIP #8- Pick Your Battles.
There are going to be times when you need to be firm and stand your ground. There are going to be other times, though, when you need to just let it go. This is ok. Life is not going to be perfect, and that is also ok. So pick your co-parenting battles wisely and do the best that you can!
TIP #9- Be Firm But Fair.
Remember that you are raising tiny humans, whom you want to grow into good adult humans. They are watching how you respond to situations. If you are strong, they will learn to be strong. If you show emotion from time to time and get back up again, they will learn that it is ok to show emotion, as long as you get back up again.
TIP #10- Listen.
Your kids are going through changes, too. They need someone to be there for them. That someone is you. Ask them how they are doing. If they are feeling down, be the shoulder they can lean on.
Here are a few icebreakers you can use when speaking to your child:
- How was school?
- What classes do you like the most?
- What is your favorite weekend activity?
- What is your favorite color?
It may sound silly, but getting your children to talk opens the doors to a closer relationship. Likewise, if something exciting is happening for them (maybe at school), listen to their stories. If you listen now, they may even continue to come to you as they get older- which is a wonderful thing, as a mom.
TIP #11- Keep Extra Stuff On Hand.
You will be so thankful that you did this, when your child has an overnight growth spurt and there is absolutely no time to go out to the store to get new clothes. Or when you’re getting low on food and you remember that you have more in the other cabinet.
It’s always a good idea to have a backup supply of things you will need. Some of these items include:
- toilet paper
- paper products
- toothpaste
- cleaning supplies
- canned goods
- snacks
TIP #12- Embrace Online Shopping.
This is a great way to stock up on extra supplies, back-ups, and just everyday necessities. You order at your convenience, and it gets shipped right to you. Many single moms use online shopping on sites like Amazon to cut down on time spent in the store. No getting everyone ready at the verge of bedtime to run to the store! It’s a win!
TIP #13: Get Out Of Bed.
You are likely to have hard days from time to time. You are human, and you have every right to feel anything and everything you feel. One thing to remember, though, is to get yourself out of bed in the morning. Your children need that solid person to take care of them, love on them, and just be there for them.
Here are a few tips if you’re struggling to get out of bed and get going:
- eat a healthy, balanced diet
- get a good night’s sleep
- get frequent exercise
- have a schedule
- set the alarm
TIP #14- Take Life One Day At A Time.
It may take a while to get yourself into a new routine, but you will get there. Remember, you got this! When things begin to get stressful and life gets a little unmanageable, keep things in perspective. Take everything step by step and eventually, you’ll make it through!
TIP #15- Carve Out Time For Yourself.
If you’re not sure, take some time to find out what you like to do. Embrace this small amount of time to do something that makes you happy!
Here are some things you can do for yourself:
- get a massage
- get a facial
- see a therapist
- go to the spa
CONCLUSION
This is not an easy time in your life. You are going to learn a whole new routine. Just remember- you will get through this. Download DComply Co-Parenting app right away. You can download it in the App Store and Google Play.
Also, follow these 15 things every single mom should do, and you will start feeling empowered. You can do this!
