Sometimes marriage is a battleground. But because battles in marriage are always with someone you love, you have to fight differently. You want the outcome to be one where both sides are satisfied. Battles like this are rare in the real world, but if you want your marriage to work, you have to change how you view the battle.
In 2 Chronicles 20:15 it says, "Thus saith the Lord unto you, Be not afraid nor dismayed … for the battle is not yours, but God’s."
If you devote your life to God and dedicate your marriage to Him, the battle becomes God’s battle and you become His soldier. All you have to do is listen to God for directions and He will direct your path. He will help you fight the battle and even fight for you. Once you turn the battle over to God, your marriage can heal.
Here are six ways you can let God heal your marriage.
1. Pray
The best way to fight any battle is on your knees. That way, you have God as your general. Pray to Him and ask for specific blessings you need. Pour your heart out to Him and let Him know you are dedicated to making your marriage work.
Pray for your spouse and ask God to help heal his/her heart. Remember, it’s God’s battle; He knows exactly what the marriage needs to succeed, so ask Him for it.
2. Be still
When fighting God’s battle with Him, sometimes you can do the most good by being still. Let go of the anger, hate, jealousy and pain, and simply be still. Allow His love to wash over you and bring peace to your troubled heart.
When you are still, God can speak to you. And, like the perfect general, He will tell you where to be and what you need to do in order for both you and your spouse to win the battle.
3. Trust God
If you want God to be your general, it is vital to trust Him. Be patient as He heals your marriage and be open to those things He directs you to do.
God will do all He can to help your marriage succeed if you turn your marriage over to Him and trust Him.
4. Face the battle
Sometimes you may feel running away from difficult things is better than facing them, but this is not the case. When you face hard things with the Lord by your side, you are given the strength and power to overcome them.
When you recognize the battle as His, you rely on His strength to fight it. All He asks of you is to face the battle with Him and He will make miracles happen.
5. Let God do the talking
Rather than say those hurtful things that often go through your mind in a marriage battle, only say the things you are led to say through the inspiration of God.
If you have the courage to open your mouth, God will fill it with the words you need to say that will help defuse the situation. His words are words of love and kindness. Look for the good in your spouse so you can give him/her words of encouragement and love.
6. Give thanks
Show gratitude to God for walking with you in your battle, and He will continue to guide you.
Show gratitude to your spouse for who he/she is and the strengths he/she brings into your marriage. Not only will this open your companion’s heart, but also it will soften yours. Showing genuine gratitude is one of the greatest ways to defuse battles.
When you learn to see the battle as God’s battle and not your own, you will have the ability to rely on Him to strengthen and bless you as you strive to strengthen your marriage. God knows what your marriage needs. He wants to bless you with those needs. When you fight the battle with Him, He will heal your marriage and make it whole.
Tiffany Fletcher, FamilyShare
Tiffany Fletcher, author of "Mother Had a Secret: Learning to Love my Mother and her Multiple Personalities" http://motherhadasecret.blogspot.com/
