Koinophobia: the Fear of Living an Ordinary Life — The Wake (2024)

Will we have time to live an interesting life? Answer: the time is now.

BY GABRIEL MATIAS CASTILHO

One day, while scrolling through my Facebook feed, I was met with an inspiring comic strip talking about how we delay things in life. It featured a man who spent his entire youth behind books, thinking about how free he would feel in college. The process would repeat itself in the following chapters of his life: in college, he would only think about how free he would be as a graduate, then as a worker, and then as a retiree. Retired, he came to realize he never allowed himself to do the things he dreamed of doing. One would take a glimpse at this comic strip and go about their day without even thinking about it, but overwhelmed by college assignments and job pressures as I was I couldn’t help to think about a simple question: will we have time to live an interesting life where we look back and approve of it? It is then that I discovered a new phobia in me—namely, Koinophobia.

Koinophobia is the fear of living an ordinary life, a fear that resembles a mid- life crisis, but instead of looking back to reassess life choices, it looks forward into what is to come. I thought the discovery of this new phobia would inspire change, but initially it only brought anxiety. What am I missing out on? What should I be doing now instead of “wasting” time in my bedroom? Thinking about all the “ifs” and “whys” served as gunpowder to this emotional mixture: at one point it would explode. But it did not. As I arrived back in the state for my senior year, out of fear of looking back at my time in Minnesota and regretting not venturing around the state, I promised myself to go out every weekend and visit a new place to hike. I look back and feel extremely happy by making this decision and transforming it into a habit. The moral of the story: maybe some phobias can be good.

Koinophobia: the Fear of Living an Ordinary Life — The Wake (2024)

FAQs

Koinophobia: the Fear of Living an Ordinary Life — The Wake? ›

Koinophobia is the fear of living an ordinary life, a fear that resembles a mid- life crisis, but instead of looking back to reassess life choices, it looks forward into what is to come. I thought the discovery of this new phobia would inspire change, but initially it only brought anxiety.

What does koinophobia mean? ›

You can't stand the thought of being average your entire life. That's koinophobia. Coined by the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, it is the fear of living an ordinary life, a life where you can comfortably meet your needs, tackle the occasional emergency, and exist without much stress or pressure.

Is koinophobia good or bad? ›

But koinophobia doesn't only compound stress and instil unrealistic expectations. It challenges our self-worth. “The fear of being ordinary can often encourage feelings of low self-worth as we believe we are not fulfilling our potential by living an 'ordinary life',” says Rachel.

How to deal with koinophobia? ›

Any fear can be difficult to overcome, the fear of being ordinary is no different. What they all need is for us to be able to objectively look at where it comes from, the facts that stack up against it, and then considering what benefit we get from keeping this fear and its control over our life.

How to overcome koinoniphobia? ›

A common treatment for koinoniphobia is exposure therapy. A therapist helps you become more comfortable being in rooms of people one step at a time. The first step may be discussing how different types of rooms make you feel.

What is fear of living called? ›

Apeirophobia may be caused by existential dread about eternal life or oblivion following death. Due to this, it is often connected with thanatophobia (fear of dying). Like other phobias, apeirophobia may be tied to mental health conditions such as anxiety disorders or obsessive-compulsive disorder.

What phobia is fear of falling in love? ›

Philophobia — a fear of love — can negatively affect your ability to have meaningful relationships. A painful breakup, divorce, abandonment or rejection during childhood or adulthood may make you afraid to fall in love. Psychotherapy (talk therapy) can help you overcome this specific phobic disorder.

What's a rare phobia? ›

What Are the Weirdest and Most Rare Phobias? 1. Arachibutyrophobia (Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth) 2. Nomophobia (Fear of being without your mobile phone) 3. Arithmophobia (Fear of numbers) 4.

Why am I living in fear? ›

Are you always waiting for disaster to strike or excessively worried about things such as health, money, family, work, or school? If so, you may have a type of anxiety disorder called generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). GAD can make daily life feel like a constant state of worry, fear, and dread.

Is it OK to live in fear? ›

Living in a world of fear produces chronic stress and impairs our immune systems, increasing inflammation and the risk of depression and physical disease. Stress also shuts down our higher brain centers, blocking our ability to think creatively, to discover solutions to our problems (LeDoux, 1996).

How do I stop living a fear of life? ›

10 ways to fight your fears
  1. Take time out. It's difficult to think clearly when you feel scared or anxious. ...
  2. Breathe through panic. ...
  3. Face your fears. ...
  4. Remember that anxiety isn't harmful. ...
  5. Challenge unhelpful thoughts. ...
  6. Don't try to be perfect. ...
  7. Visualise a happy place. ...
  8. Talk about it.
Jun 13, 2024

Why am I having phobia? ›

Many phobias start because of a bad experience or panic attack related to a specific object or situation. Sometimes even seeing or hearing about a bad experience can be enough to trigger a phobia. Genetics or learned behavior. There may be a link between your specific phobia and the phobia or anxiety of your parents.

Why is it okay to be ordinary? ›

Because by embracing and appreciating the simple and ordinary moments of your life, you can free yourself from that feeling that nothing is good enough. This is not to say that you should use gratitude to paper over pain or problems — that's the road to toxic positivity, not contentment.

What is koinophobia? ›

Koinophobia is the fear of living an ordinary life, a fear that resembles a mid- life crisis, but instead of looking back to reassess life choices, it looks forward into what is to come.

Is the fear of mirrors rare? ›

This condition is very rare, but it can also be quite serious. 1 Like other phobias, spectrophobia can disrupt all aspects of an individual's life and lead to avoidance behaviors. Experiencing symptoms of spectrophobia can be incredibly debilitating and can impact one's overall quality of life.

Is there a phobia of having your picture taken? ›

As for the reasons for fear of having your picture was taken (Scopophobia), they can run the gamut from what others may think about the photo to the fear that some part of your soul or spiritual essence will be captured and imprisoned in the camera or picture.

Is Athazagoraphobia a real phobia? ›

Athazagoraphobia is an uncommon and specific phobia characterized by an irrational fear of being forgotten, ignored, or overlooked by others. It can also refer to the fear of forgetting another person or thing.

What means Tomophobia? ›

noun. to·​mo·​pho·​bia ˌtō-mə-ˈfō-bē-ə : intense fear of surgery or surgical procedures.

What is kenophobia? ›

(ˌkɛnəˈfəʊbɪə ) noun. an abnormal fear of empty spaces. Collins English Dictionary.

What is a fear of being poor called? ›

Peniaphobia is fear of being poor or fear of having no money.

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