Online dating and romance scams (2024)

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Scammers use romance, dating or friendship to get your trust and your money.

Never trust that someone you only know online is who they say they are. Scammers work hard to trick you into thinking the relationship is real, then manipulate you to get your money. They can spend years building your trust.

Scammers use social media, dating or gaming apps and websites to find people looking for love and friendship. They create fake profiles, sometimes of famous people. They might also call or message a lot to make you feel special. This is sometimes called 'love bombing'.

Once you trust them, they might tell you about an urgent problem they need your money for. They might ask you to set up accounts or transfer money they give you. Or they might convince you to use cryptocurrency and invest in a fake scheme they say is real. Either way, the scammer steals your money and disappears, and you don't get it back.

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Signs it might be a scam

  • The relationship moves fast and they soon say they have strong feelings for you. They 'lovebomb' you, messaging or calling a lot and make you feel very special.
  • The scammerquickly tries to move your chat from a social media platform or online dating to a free messaging platform like GoogleHangouts, WeChat, Line or WhatsApp.
  • Once there's an emotional connection, the scammer encourages youto make money through different investments, often cryptocurrency. They may offer to spend time 'showing you' how to make 'easy money'.
  • They may tell you they have an emergency and urgently need your money, or ask youto set up accounts or transfer money they give you.
  • They want you to only trust them and keep things secret.They may try to cut you off from family and friends.
  • Therealways seems to be some reason they can’t meet in person or video chat. Often they say they're overseas, somewhere remote or their technology isn’t working.

Other 'red flags' or signs to look for

  • Their online profile doesn’t match what they tell you about themselves.
  • They ask you for personal photos, videos or information that could be used against you in the future.
  • The scammer threatens you or gets angry if you ask questions ordon’t do what they ask. They may say they'll end the relationship.

Protect yourself

Lots of people look for friends and even find love online.

Just remember that scams are very common.

Keep yourself safe by staying updated on scams, and how to spot people who want your money or identity, not your love.

Never send money to someone you haven't met

  • If they askyou for money, they're probablya scammer. Stop contact straightaway and getsupport.
  • Never send money, card or bank details, personal informationor identity documents to someone you only know online, no matter how long you’ve been messaging.
  • Never agree to transfer money for someone else. They may be involving you in a crime called money laundering, and you could be charged withacriminal offence.

Check who's really there

  • Take things slowly when you meet new people online. Ask lots of questions and watch for things that don’t add up.
  • Search for the scammer’s name along with the word ‘scam’ in a search, and look for websites about romance scams in the results.
  • If you have a picture of them, do a reverse image search to find out if the same picture is online in different places, with different names or personal details.
  • Find out more about different types of investment scams so you can spot red flags, or signs that something is a scam.

Be careful of what you share (and what you don't)

  • Never send nudes or sexually intimate photosor videos to people you don’t know. Scammers can use them to threaten and blackmail you.
  • Don’t keep an online relationship secret. Tell people you trust about it. It can be easier for someone else to spotthings that don't seem right.
  • Think carefully about sharing information about your hobbies, job or family online. Scammers can use this to hurt you, or steal your identity.
  • Find out how to stay safe on different social media platforms.
  • Find out what to do if someone is using your personal information to scam others.

How to spot a fake profile

They usually have:

  • photos that look too professional
  • photos that are blurry or unclear
  • very little personal information
  • few or no connections to social media accounts
  • few comments, likes or shares on their social media from other people.

If you’ve been affected

  1. Act fast to stop any further losses Contact your bank or card provider immediately to report the scam. Ask them to stop any transactions.Change passwords on all your devices and online accounts like banking, email, government and shopping.
  2. Get help to recover

    IDCARE is Australia and New Zealand’s national identity and cyber support service. They can help you make a plan (for free) to limit the damage. Call them on 1800 595 160 or visit their website to find out more.

  3. Report the scam Once you have secured your details, you can help us try to stop the scam and warn others byreporting the scam to us.

Find out more about what to do if you've been scammed

Real life stories

Online dating and romance scams (1)

Dating and romance scam: Georgina's Facebook fiancé leaves her flat broke

If you’ve only ever met online, you need to take extra precautions to protect yourself. Don’t let scammers take advantage of your better nature and steal your money.

Online dating and romance scams (2024)

FAQs

Online dating and romance scams? ›

Romance scammers create fake profiles on dating sites and apps or contact you through popular social media sites like Instagram or Facebook. The scammers strike up a relationship with you to build up trust, sometimes talking or chatting several times a day. Then, they make up a story and ask for money.

What are dating and romance scams? ›

A romance scam is a form of confidence scheme whereby a scammer gains the trust of a victim by developing a romantic relationship. This relationship usually begins through contact on social media or dating applications, but can also occur on online job sites. Victims can be both men and women.

How do you know if you are chatting with a scammer online? ›

Be suspicious of anyone who asks you for financial assistance, no matter how dire their circ*mstances seem to be. If you encounter one of these storylines when you're talking to a new love interest on the internet, there's a good chance they're scamming you. "I need money to support a sick relative."

What are three excuses a scammer uses? ›

Scammers often come up with various reasons, such as emergencies, medical expenses, or travel costs. Never send money to someone you've only met online.

Will a romance scammer ever meet you in person? ›

Scammers may propose marriage and make plans to meet in person, but that will never happen. Eventually, they will ask for money. The criminals who carry out romance scams are experts at what they do and will seem genuine, caring, and believable. Con artists are present on most dating and social media sites.

What are the red flags of a scammer? ›

Unsolicited offers: Don't respond to unsolicited cold calls, emails, junk mail, late-night commercials or infomercials, or social media posts that are either overly attractive or fear-inducing. These are all common tactics scammers use to entice you to engage.

Will a romance scammer call you on the phone? ›

What Is a Romance Scam? You meet someone special on a dating website or app. Soon they want to email, call, or message you off the platform. They say it's true love, but they live far away — maybe for work or because they're in the military.

How do you prove someone you met online is real? ›

Not everyone who is dating online has good intentions and it's important to look out for suspicious profiles or behaviour. Check if they have verified their images or identity, if that's an option. You can also try an image search, to make sure their profile picture is not of someone else.

How do you test a romance scammer? ›

Research your cyber sweetheart's presence on other platforms like Facebook, Instagram, and even LinkedIn to verify that they are who they say they are. You can also do a reverse image search using a photo of them from their dating profile.

How do you scare a romance scammer? ›

Stop communicating with the individual immediately. Talk to someone you trust and describe what's going on. Notify the website or social media platform where the scammer first made contact. This can lead to the scammer's profile being removed, protecting other potential victims.

How do you know if an online relationship is real? ›

First, ensuring that the person you communicate with is who they say they are is crucial. Beware if someone you have connected with solely online acts suspiciously, especially if they ask for money or personal information.

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