Signs your aging parents need help managing their finances (2024)

It's inevitable. As we age, our bodies and our brains change, and not always like fine wine. Cognitive skills decline as part of the normal aging process and in turn, so do some of our financial management skills.

Signs your aging parents need help managing their finances (1)

Research shows that financial decision-making peaks around age 53, and by age 60 our ability to process new information starts to slow. The shift happens at a different pace for everyone, and it can be accelerated by medical conditions such as Alzheimer's and dementia. While some people are capable of managing their own finances throughout their lifetime, others may find their skills suffering.

The impact could be as benign as paying a utility bill twice, or something worse, like falling prey to a scam.

Experts say there are signs that children or spouses can watch out for that will help them know when it's time to step in and help an older relative with their finances.

"This will probably happen to someone you love or to you," said Bill Hensley, director of education at the National Endowment for Financial Education. "The way to deal with it is to plan ahead. Plan ahead, prepare for the worst, put those safeguards in place."

A new study from the University of Alabama, with support from the NEFE, has identified five signs that aging may be impacting someone's financial decision making.

The study looked at up to seven years of financial skill performance among cognitively normal older adults. The warning signs of financial decline it found are:

— Taking longer to complete everyday financial tasks;

— Missing key details in financial documents;

— Having difficulty with everyday math;

— Showing decreased understanding of common financial concepts;

— Having difficulty identifying risks in an investment opportunity.

Seeing any of these signs doesn't mean an elderly relative needs to have their checkbook taken away immediately. But they can be a warning that decline is occurring. And that can be a sign that help is needed.

"Hopefully we are helping people understand the importance of planning ahead so that you are not the victim of your own cognitive decline, or someone else taking advantage of that," Hensley said.

Make a plan to improve your finances in 2017

Unfortunately, this planning often doesn't occur until after an illness, death or other unfortunate event. But ideally, people should be putting plans and documents into place to protect themselves by midlife or earlier.

Here are a few tips on how to prepare:

START THE CONVERSATION

If possible, begin talking about how you want your financial matters handled early, before things go awry. Talk to your spouse, your children and other loved ones about your preferences and game plan.

If initiating the conversation about someone else, do so gently. Ask them where basic documents such as a will are stored, or if they even exist. Another effective tactic is to start by saying "I'm thinking of doing X, Y or Z for myself, what have you done?"

Experts also suggest pointing to a loved one's death or something in popular culture as a starting point. Financial planners say requests for medical directives jumped after the 2005 death of Terri Schiavo, the brain-damaged Florida woman whose family fought a years-long right-to-die case.

This isn't a conversation that will, or should, happen in one sitting.

Signs your aging parents need help managing their finances (2)

"Assure them we aren't taking over your finances, but we want to make sure you are protected," said Amy Florian, whose business specializes in teaching people how to support and interact with those going through life-changing events.

People often avoid these conversations because they are uncomfortable talking about money or thinking about death. Florian says to be clear that this isn't about dying, it's about living and taking the burdens off your family.

"It's about living the way you want to until you take your last breath," she said. "There are things you can't control, but control what you can."

ESTABLISH YOUR TEAM

Pick a team to help monitor and potentially step in if your financial skills start to deteriorate. This can include family, friends or others you trust.

Assign roles to everyone involved: name someone to serve as your medical decision maker should you need one, and someone to act as your financial power of attorney. And consider whether you want one person in charge, or if you want some checks and balances in place.

Talk to everyone involved to make sure they are comfortable with their role.

CREATE ESSENTIAL DOCUMENTS

Get some basic legal documents in place to ensure your wishes can be carried out.

At a minimum, write a will, a medical directive and a financial inventory listing all your financial accounts, assets and insurance policies. Keep these documents in a safe place and let your team know where to access them.

Seek professional assistance from a lawyer, estate planner or financial planner along the way if needed.

Five doable strategies for financial success in 2017

Florian also suggests that people prepare a "diminishing capacity letter" giving permission to a financial planner or other professional to contact loved ones if they believe their mental capacity is weakening.

MANAGE YOUR PLAN

It's important for families to be in sync about what needs to happen if it becomes necessary to take over a loved one's financial decisions, said Suzanne Schmitt, vice president of family engagement at Fidelity Investments.

Financial interdependence is often a gradual process. Some people may want early intervention, such as setting up alerts for their kids if their accounts show unusual activity. Others do not want any help unless their mental capacity is dramatically diminished. Respect those preferences.

"Be proactive, plan as if this will happen, even if it never does, have a plan in case it does," Hensley said.

Signs your aging parents need help managing their finances (2024)

FAQs

Signs your aging parents need help managing their finances? ›

Unexplained Bank Withdrawals or Charges. One of the most evident signs that your aging parents may struggle with their finances is unexplained bank withdrawals or charges. This could signify forgetfulness, confusion, or even financial exploitation.

How do I monitor my elderly parents' finances? ›

Ways to monitor your parents' accounts
  1. Review paper statements. This is the least convenient and least efficient way to review activity on your parents' financial accounts. ...
  2. Get online access. ...
  3. Set up account alerts. ...
  4. Use a credit monitoring service. ...
  5. Sign up for all-in-one monitoring.

How do you know if your parents are struggling financially? ›

Unexplained Bank Withdrawals or Charges. One of the most evident signs that your aging parents may struggle with their finances is unexplained bank withdrawals or charges. This could signify forgetfulness, confusion, or even financial exploitation.

How do I know if my elderly parents need help? ›

Seven Signs Elderly Parents Need More Support at Home
  1. Changes in the Home Environment. Is their home in disarray, messier and/or more cluttered than normal? ...
  2. Weight loss or gain. ...
  3. Medication Misuse. ...
  4. Unpaid bills. ...
  5. Changes in Mood. ...
  6. Physical Frailty. ...
  7. Possible Abuse.
Dec 22, 2021

Are you financially responsible for your elderly parents? ›

Filial responsibility laws, also known as filial support laws, are legal statutes that require adult children to financially support their parents if they are unable to do so themselves. In California, these laws are outlined in Family Code Section 4400.

How do you help my parents who are struggling financially? ›

5 Ways to Financially Support Elderly Parents
  1. Provide them with financing. ...
  2. Hire an outside planner to manage care and finances. ...
  3. Look for government savings. ...
  4. Set your parents up with a private reverse mortgage. ...
  5. Invite your parents to stay in an “in-law” apartment on your property.
Sep 4, 2023

When should you take over elderly parents' finances? ›

When Is It Time To Start Managing Your Parent's Finances?
  1. There are piles of unopened mail at the house.
  2. Your parents seem to lose track of cash or checks.
  3. Your parents cannot explain calls from creditors.
  4. Your parents complain about not having enough money.
  5. You notice frequent and uncharacteristic trips to the bank.
Jan 18, 2024

Which are examples of financial abuse of the elderly? ›

(e) Financial exploitation. - The improper use of an adult's funds, property or resources by another individual including, but not limited to, fraud, false pretenses, embezzlement, conspiracy, forgery, falsifying records, coercion, property transfers or denying them access to their wealth.

Should I be on my elderly parents bank account? ›

While sharing a joint bank account is a convenient option to assist in your parent's finances, it does present some risks, such as: Financial risks with joint accounts: With any joint account, each account holder could be impacted by the financial decisions of the other.

Are you obligated to help parents financially? ›

Specifically, California Family Code section 4400 (“FC 4400”) states that, “Except as otherwise provided by law, an adult child shall, to the extent of the adult child's ability, support a parent who is in need and unable to self-maintain by work.”

How do you tell your parents you need financial help? ›

Don't just say you need money. Spell out exactly what it's for. Show that you have a well-reasoned plan for how to spend it. Demonstrate how it will help your life.

How do you know if someone is financially irresponsible? ›

They Don't Pay Their Bills

While anyone can miss the occasional due date, regularly failing to pay bills on time can be a sign that they are deliberately avoiding payments, or are irresponsible. Look for envelopes marked “final notice.” Your partner may also be receiving phone calls from debt collectors.

When to worry about aging parents? ›

Judgment Issues

Watch for impairments in regard to judgment or complex tasks. For example, if your aging parents no longer pay their bills on time, cannot navigate their checkbook, or want to wear a winter coat outside on a warm spring day, consider investigating further.

When should you step in with elderly parents? ›

A decline in housekeeping and house maintenance (dishes piled in the sink, dirty floors, broken railings, drippy faucets, dirty walls, etc.) A noticeable decline in grooming, dress and personal care. Unexplained weight loss (or gain) Inability to recognize or react to danger.

How to tell if your parent is getting dementia? ›

10 Early Signs and Symptoms of Alzheimer's and Dementia
  1. Memory loss that disrupts daily life. ...
  2. Challenges in planning or solving problems. ...
  3. Difficulty completing familiar tasks. ...
  4. Confusion with time or place. ...
  5. Trouble understanding visual images and spatial relationships. ...
  6. New problems with words in speaking or writing.

Should I put my name on my elderly parents bank account? ›

You could jeopardize your parent's financial security if you have financial challenges. For example, creditors can take the money in the joint account as collateral to settle your debts. Additionally, the funds in the joint bank account can also affect your eligibility to qualify for college financial aid.

How can I help my elderly parent with a bank account? ›

Get a Financial Power of Attorney

With a financial power of attorney, the elder gives another person legal authority to act on their behalf. Usually the document gives the designated "agent" or "attorney-in-fact" broad powers to handle the elder's financial affairs.

What is the best way to protect an elderly parent's assets? ›

Ensure your parents have an up-to-date will. You can explore establishing trusts for asset protection and estate planning. Consult with an estate planning attorney to tailor a plan that meets your parents' specific needs and wishes. Consult with a financial advisor experienced in elder finance issues.

What is financial insecurity in elderly? ›

In this instance, an older adult is defined as someone who is age 60. and older and the threshold for economic security is at 250% of the federal. poverty level. Economically insecure older adults may have to make tough. decisions on how they are going to spend their limited resources.

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