Olivia MunsonUSA TODAY
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Maybe you have heard someone say they have a "love language."
Indeed, love is more than just a four-letter word, andwhen it comes to love, we all communicatethe feeling differently.Some people prefer to express their affection throughhandwritten letters. Others are more appreciative if their significant other cooks dinner for date night.
According to "The FiveLove Languages"by Gary Chapman, our love languages can teach us a lot about how we approach love and relationships, helping us recognize our preferencesin ourselvesand inloved ones.
It does not take a love linguist to figure out your love language. Once you do, you may be able to connect moreand grow even closer to your loved ones.
What is my love language?
There are a couple ways todetermine your own love language.
The first is to take "The Love Language" quiz.This is from the official love languages website and asks a series of this-or-that questions to identify your primary love language. Once you finish the quiz, it gives percentages to comparehow much your style of love relates to the five love languages.
If you do not want to take the test, you can take note of what makes you feel most loved. Consider how you prefer to receive affection from others. You may find out you have more than one love language.
All in all, your love language outlines your personal style of love. Although there are five classifications, a person's love language is unique to them.
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Types of love languages, explained
The term "love language" comes frommarriage counselor Gary Chapman's 1992 book, "The Five Love Languages."
According to Chapman, there are five ways in which people bestexpress and experience romantic love, meaning five"love languages:"
- Acts of service
- Receiving gifts
- Quality time
- Words of affirmation
- Physical touch
Act of service: Forthis love language, actions speak louder than words. This could mean you prefer when your romantic partner helps you with a project or they do a task for you, such as picking up the weekly groceries or cleaning up the house.
Receiving gifts: Contrary to how it might sound, this language is not about being materialistic. Those with this love language feel most loved when their partner gives them something heartfelt and meaningful, no matter how big or small the gift. Examples includegiving flowers on a random occasion or purchasing something your partner said they needed.
Quality time: This is just ashow it sounds: spending ample, undividedtime with your partner. This could include taking walks, going on a picnic or just hanging outone-on-one and enjoying each other's company.
Word of affirmation: This lets literal words do the love communicating. For this love language, people feel most affirmed through praise, compliments and overall open, positive communication. Examplesincludethanking your partner for doing a task, voicing your appreciation for them and, of course, saying, "I love you."
Physical touch: This love language is rooted in appropriate physical interaction, such as holding hands, hugging, cuddling or kissing.
Is your love language what you give or receive?
As defined byChapman, your love language relates to how you receive love. It exemplifies what makes you feel most appreciated and emotionally fulfilled.
However, how you wish to receive love may be different than how you give it to others. While you may prefer receiving gifts, you may not likegivinggifts. The same goes for anyother love language.
Differing styles: What to do if you and your partner have different love languages
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