Your boss is the last person you want to have trouble with at work. As best as possible, an employee seeks to please their higher-ups and make them happy to avoid any untoward conflicts. And engaging with a boss is not difficult to do when you or any of the employees working with them embody all the positive characteristics.
However, not all people are lucky to work with a good boss. Some bosses turn out to be the one who bullies and enjoys looking down on their subordinates. While a boss should play a role model and set a good example at work instead of initiating a conflict, there are quite a number of bosses that bully.Approximately 41 percent of direct managers and external managersare likely to become a bully to their subordinates in the workplace.
Toxic bosses will bring about tremendous negative effects on the work environment and culture, such as high turnover, poor productivity, as well as low work enthusiasm and motivation. Among ways to deal with such toxic bosses are immediately changing bosses or finding a better work culture in another organization. This, however, is easier said than done - it is not always easy as it seems, especially when you are working in an ideal company that provides good job security, retirement, perks, and benefits. With all the consideration, you might want to find a way to cope with your boss instead of changing a job.
If you decided to deal with a bully supervisor, you should know the reason why and how to deal with such behaviors. But let’s first understand why a boss can be a bully.
Why does your boss pick on you?
When your boss is constantly targeting you and does not treat other employees the same as he would you, it is clear that he does not want you to be around. The question is: WHY?
Unless you have a superpower to read someone’s mind, you can only speculate the reasons why your boss doesn't like you. There are plenty to guess, such as:
How to tell if your boss is only picking on you - and not others?
When your boss is a moody person, he might not only take out his anger on you but on all team members, especially the ones he does not like. If your boss feels insecure about someone’s ability, he will likely target that certain person. Your boss might not want his position to be taken by someone else, therefore he will only pick on someone who threatens his position.
Knowing your boss' characteristics is one way to truly understand whether your boss is a toxic boss or he just doesn't like you. Other ways to know if your boss is only picking on you are as follows:
What to do if your boss is picking on you?
Being a target of bullying drains our energy faster. We are also likely to havedecreased productivity and work motivation. Leaving a toxic boss is the best option, but if your condition - having difficulty with changing jobs or relocation - does not support your situation, here are some tips to deal with bully bosses:
No person just woke up one day and decided he will portray the role of a difficult boss; there is always something behind the behavior. By really knowing the person behind the title “boss”, “manager”, or “department head”, you are opening a door to friendship beyond work. Your boss is also a human being with personal issues that he probably hides behind a smirk and a high tone of voice. Show your interest by making small talk about his family, friends, good work, hobbies, and anything that seems to light him up in a positive way.
Sometimes you come to the office in a bad mood because of an unresolved personal matter. You would wish your co-workers to understand instead of minding your gloom. In the same way, your boss could be under a lot of pressure at work or at home that he is unable to keep everything together by becoming too unreasonable to you. When he takes out his unreasonable behavior on you, give him the benefit of the doubt and allow room for understanding.
Among the best pieces of advice given is to take each day as an opportunity to learn something. You can learn from the experience even though it is bitter and keepin mind that someday soon you too will become a boss and you might also be making somebody else’s life at work miserable. Start stocking up on your wisdom so that you will be a better boss in the future.
If your boss’ behavior against you is work-related then there is really no reason for you to take it personally, especially when you have been underachieving expectations at work. But if you are quite sure that his treatment of you is anything but work-related, don’t be afraid to make a stand. Remember that bullies feed on your approval to act that way. They cannot affect you mentally (or physically) unless you allow them.
When you have done your best to understand and allow your boss to explain his behavior but nothing changes, it is time for you to leave the room willingly. Working in a prestigious company is great but if it makes your life miserable or makes you feel less valuable, then the perks and benefits do not equal your worth.
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