Woman Refuses To Contribute $500 To Fund Her Cousin’s Wedding, Family Drama Ensues (2024)

FAQs

Should a woman pay for her own wedding? ›

"Every single couple is unique, which means every single wedding's finances will be unique. Some couples might choose to stick with the tradition, some might be paying for their own wedding in full, and others might be receiving financial help from both families in some way."

How much do parents pay? On average, parents pay between 35-40% of the wedding costs. If you follow tradition, the bride's family is expected to meet the bigger portion of the wedding expenses. But since money is like a gift to your wedding, you should be thankful for what the parents offer.

Be honest and upfront

Explain how honored you are to be asked, but being in a wedding is not possible with your budget right now.

"The notion of the bride's family paying for the wedding evolved from the tradition of a dowry, where the bride's family transferred property or money to the husband or husband's family upon marriage," says Cynthia Meyer, a certified financial planner (CFP) at Real Life Planning in the greater New York area.

"Brides and grooms are generally older and financially independent by the time they marry. It's more common today for couples to host and pay for a portion or all of their wedding expenses."

The groom's family traditionally paid for all costs associated with the rehearsal dinner and honeymoon, wedding day transportation, and the officiant. The groom paid for the bride's engagement ring, wedding ring, and groomsmen gifts. It is also common for the groom's family to pay for the alcohol at the reception.

There's no universal age at which parents stop contributing to their children's weddings. The decision varies from family to family and is influenced by factors such as cultural norms, financial stability, and individual preferences.

Bottom line: There's no hard-and-fast rule on how much cash to give as a wedding gift. Wedding experts advise starting at $100. From there, you may want to adjust up to $500 based on factors such as your relationship with the couple, your budget and the cost of your attendance at the wedding.

The topic of money can be touchy, and no one wants to inadvertently offend. Traditionally, the breakdown of expenses was very clear: The bride's family paid for the groom's ring, engagement party, the wedding and reception, a brunch the next day, and a belated reception (if there was one).

When you say no, don't offer explanations or excuses. Doing so only opens the door to a discussion and prompts your friend or family member to try to overcome your objections. Say, “I'm sorry, but I can't give you a loan.” When the person asks, “Why not?” just repeat your statement.

How to politely decline something you can't afford? ›

“I can't this time, but once I'm done saving for ___, I'd love to.” “Money is a bit tight at the moment, so I'll skip brunch this time.” “I just really can't afford it right now, I hope you can understand.” “I've got some big savings goals I'm trying to kick – can we take a raincheck?”

Expect to spend less than you would for a close relative (Swann says $25 is a perfectly good starting point), but again, the extent of your friendship (and your budget) will indicate how much you should spend.

The old-school etiquette books would dictate that the parents of the bride should foot most of the bill for the wedding but the reality is that most couples end up working together with their families to cover the cost.

How Much Does the Bride's Parents Provide for the Wedding? As for the bride's parents' financial responsibility, Hoopes says they typically cover around 70 to 80 percent of the wedding cost. However, Hardtmands adds that in some cases, the bride's parents pay for 100 percent of the wedding.

The bride's parents pay for the wedding dress. They also pay for any other elements of the bride's outfit, such as shoes, veil, hair accessories and jewellery. It's also the responsibility of the bride's mother to accompany her while dress shopping, and help her choose a gown.

Wedding couples aren't paying for expenses entirely by themselves. Only 16.6 percent of couples are paying for their entire wedding themselves, while 33.6 percent are paying for at least part of it, according to online wedding resource Zola.

According to tradition, a couples' parents typically contribute in part or in full to their wedding expenses.

For some busy brides, hiring a wedding planner will be the answer to all your problems. However, for those who want to have more creative control or save a little money, planning your own wedding may be the way to go.

Traditionally, it is the responsibility of the bride's family – specifically, her mother and father – to pay for most of the wedding. It's not clear exactly how this tradition started, but it's thought to have evolved from the practice of the bride's family paying a dowry to the husband.