As a longtime Airbnb host, I've turned down my share of potential guests. I've also spoken to a number of would-be users who have been frustrated with their inability to find a place to stay on the site. It seems that, no matter how many hosts they message, nobody is willing to rent them a room.
I hear you guys, and I'm here to set you straight as to why. Thing is, what many first-time Airbnb guests don't quite get is that the site has as much in common with OkCupid as it does
And like an online dating site,how you present yourself—be it in your profile or the messages you send—makes a huge difference when it comes to other users' willingness to let you into their lives. If hosts are turning you down, or simply ignoring your messages altogether, here's what you're doing wrong, and how to fix it.
You Have An Empty Or Incomplete Profile
Does your profile have a real picture, or did you put up a fuzzy photo of your dog? Does ittell us anything about you and your interests or personality, or is it blank?
Here's the deal:Airbnb hosts want to know a little bit about who they may be letting into their home (wouldn't you?), and are far more likely to accept a fleshed-out personality than an anonymous profile. So if you have a barebonesprofileor aphoto that shows anything other than a clear imageof your face, you're far more likely to have your stay denied. Lets put it this way: At the recent Airbnb Open in Paris, one of the conference's biggest applauses came after an Airbnb executive announcedthat all guests would soonbe required to have actual photos of their faces.
Your Message Seems Copy-Pasted
Does your intro message feel like something copy-pasted to a dozen other hosts, or did you take the time to personalize it to me and my listing? Does it mention anything in my profile that demonstrates that you read and internalized it—and therefore won’t be surprised when you show up and find out it’s a fifth-floor walkup, for example? Experienced Airbnb hosts know that a guest is far more likely to be a good one—that is,a low-maintenanceand pleasant person wholeaves a decent review—if their expectations are met. Yourmessage is the place to demonstrate that your expectations are in line with what the host is offering.
Still stuck?Here's a cheat sheet for how to write a good Airbnb message: Introduce yourself, clarify what dates you are looking to travel, give the purpose of your visit (Is it to visit family? Attend a conference? Go to a wedding?), and cite something specific from the listing that appealed to you (the decor, location, a specific amenity... anything that shows us you actually read the listing). Then end the messageby (and this is absolutely key)asking if the dates are available and if you can stay. The act of asking—as opposed to demanding the dates or trying to push a booking through without permission—shows that you respect the host and their home, and will go miles towards getting you a successful booking.
You Asked For A Discount
Many guests think that, hey, it can’t hurt to ask for a deal. Right? I’m here to tell you that, yes, it can hurt. Pop over to one of the Web’s many Airbnb host-centric message boards and you’ll find that many, if not most, experienced hosts not only won’t negotiate on price, but alsowon’t book guests who ask. Even at full price.
Why? There’s a perception in the Airbnb host community (and one that comes from experience, I mightadd) that guests who ask for discounts tend to be high-maintenance, nitpicky, and are more likely to leave negative reviews or complain about their stay.
To see what I mean, I’m just going to quote from a recent post on the airhostsforum.com message board:
“You must decline negotiators. They are throwing out red flags by disrespecting you. From experience we can tell you that accepting negotiators will bring you the worst guests. People who have no compunctions about bullying you and are looking for all they can get for the lowest price. I would rather have it sit empty than kow-tow to that type of guest… They just want to win, and think about it....is that the kind of person you really want in your home?”
You Asked A Ton Of Unnecessary Questions
Before you ask your host any questions about their listing, you really should read the full thingfirst to see if it’s answered within (spoiler alert: it probably is). Worse, asking too many questions may actually cause a host to decline your stay.
Airbnb hosting can be time consuming, and it can be rather aggravating answering the same questions again and again. There’s also a (totally accurate, I might add) perception amongst experienced Airbnb hosts that guests who dutifully read the entire listing are the best guests, are most likely to have their expectations fully met (hey, they know what they’re getting into!), and leave the best reviews.
Again, I’m just going to quote a post from a user onairhostsforum.com:
“After the second email where they are just asking random, redundant, ask-and-answered questions and do not commit to a booking I don't reply and usually take them off pre-approved. It’s a good way to weed out overly needy guests and attract low-maintenance,seasoned travelers.”
Thousands of Airbnb hosts gathered at the recent Airbnb Open in Paris (photo: Seth Porges)
You Left Nitpicky Reviews On Past Stays
Sure, thereviews left for guests by past hosts are important, but thedirty little secret is that they aren't nearly as important as the reviews you yourself haveleft on hosts you've stayed with.Hosts live in constant fear of the dreaded Bad Review. So you better believe we check what reviews a guest has left for previous hosts they’ve stayed with. If these reviews come off as unfair (“the sheets were the wrong color,” “it was raining the entire time,” “they didn’t provide a service that was neither advertised nor asked for”), a host is apt to assume you’ll be a needy guest who will leave a bad review, even if the host goes above and beyond to keep you happy.
As reddit user ASayWhat put it:
"I look at the reviews they have leftfor other hosts and check for things like nitpicky complaints about their being a smudge on the baseboard, scratchy toilet paper, etc. and/or a mismatch between what they said happened and what the host said. Some guests leave a really nasty review for hosts when other guests haven't and that is telling. These people are hard to please and don't mind sharing petty thoughts in public. I can do without them personally."
If you have good reason to leave a bad review, you definitely should. But the fact is we’re humans and not hotels, and the best Airbnb guests understand that—and come with expectations to match.
You Ask Us To Do Things That Aren’t Offered In The Listing
If the listing doesn’t mention anything about picking you up from the airport or running errands for you, please don’t treat the host like a concierge and ask them to do it. Honestly, you should probably just read this post by Silicon Valley-area Reddit user GailaMonster about her experience with a guest who asked her to pick him up from the airport at 11pm. After check-in, things only got worse:
"I'm getting ready to leave, and guest asks for a ride to
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