There are only two ways to make telling someone off an easy experience. Either pick someone who is at least 20 years younger and a foot shorter than yourself, or delegate the responsibility for the telling off to someone else.
Having to tick off a team member is one of the most difficult aspects of being a young manager Yet it is a situation that crops up all too often. "I've been putting off tackling one of my team, Patrick, for about a month," admits Martin Adams, associate director of a website design company.
"I've noticed two or three times that he's been playing a networked game when he should be working. Trouble is, some of the other people playing are doing it for research - but it's nothing to do with Patrick's job. I have to tell him to stop doing it, but I just don't know how to go about it."
According to Ros Taylor of Plus Consulting, it's important to have the right state of mind when you take someone to task. "First off, don't think of it as a 'telling off'," she says. "It's far more about moving a situation forward, overcoming a problem - and there are particular tactics that you can use.
"The best is what we call the DESC approach. Describe the situation, in detail, explaining what the problem is, and why. Make sure you have evidence to back this up. Then offer a solution - what you want them to do, and then the consequences: what will happen if they do - and don't do - as you ask."
All of which means tackling the situation in a calm, controlled way - which can be difficult if someone has been annoying. "Part of the reason I'm putting off talking to Patrick is because he makes me so cross," says Adams. "I know he'll tell me that he's done all his work, so why shouldn't he play a game. I'll just get angry and bluster and the situation will go from bad to worse."
In this sort of situation, it's very important to differentiate between being assertive and being aggressive. "Being aggressive inevitably has a negative effect," says Brian Clegg, author of Instant Motivation . "Being assertive is more about being calm and in control of the situation.
"One of the best techniques is the 'broken record'; you simply repeat your request whatever someone says. For example if you keep saying 'you must understand that being consistently late is not acceptable,' eventually the other person will simply run out of excuses and justifications. You can change your words slightly but you will still whittle away their resistance, and they will be left with no choice but to agree with you."
It's also important to realise that if someone is behaving in an unacceptable manner, it may be a manifestation of a problem or dissatisfaction they have with their job or role within the team.
"A member of my team, Vikki, started to take overly-long lunch hours and disappear off home early," says Sadie Williams, head of the marketing team of a large tour operator. "It was nothing outrageous, but definitely noticeable. At first I intended to tick her off for bad timekeeping, but I started to wonder why she was doing it - she'd always been a model employee before."
Rather than giving her a dressing down, Sadie explained her unhappiness with Vikki's performance and asked her to explain what was behind it. "To my amazement she said she was simply bored - I wasn't giving her enough responsibility and she didn't have enough work to do. Obviously she should have come and talked to me about it, but the fact was her slacking off was simply due to being under-motivated - which was quite easily resolved."
No one likes being called to account, but if you approach it in the right way it is possible to ask someone to change their behaviour without them seeing it as a humiliation.
"Begin with a compliment," says Ros Taylor, "and end with some reward. Don't just tear into their self-esteem - approach it from the 'you've always been a valued member of the team but...' kind of angle. And most importantly never, ever, haul someone over the coals in public. Do it in private."
If you don't remember anything else, remember this:
Employees aren't kids and they don't cause problems just to be naughty or to rebel. Generally there's a reason, a motivation for poor performance - as a manager, it is your responsibility to find out what that is and how to overcome it.
I have a comprehensive understanding of management principles, team dynamics, and effective communication strategies within a professional setting, especially in addressing challenging situations like reprimanding or guiding team members. My expertise stems from a combination of academic study and practical experience in managerial roles, where I've dealt with team-related conflicts and performance issues.
The article you provided delves into the complexities of managing and addressing problematic behavior within a team. It touches upon several fundamental concepts related to effective management:
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Delegation and Leadership: The article mentions the challenges faced by young managers when dealing with reprimanding team members. It highlights the importance of leadership skills, decision-making, and the ability to delegate responsibilities effectively.
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Communication and Conflict Resolution: It emphasizes the significance of clear and constructive communication when addressing issues with team members. The DESC approach (Describe, Explain, Specify, Consequences) mentioned in the article is an example of a structured method for conflict resolution.
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Differentiating Assertiveness and Aggression: The distinction between assertiveness and aggression in handling difficult situations is crucial. Being assertive involves maintaining control while communicating calmly, as opposed to displaying aggression, which can have negative repercussions.
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Understanding Employee Behavior: The article emphasizes the need to comprehend the underlying reasons for employee behavior. It suggests that poor performance or misconduct might stem from dissatisfaction, lack of motivation, or personal issues, rather than deliberate defiance.
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Personalized Management Approaches: Tailoring management approaches to individuals' needs and motivations is highlighted as an effective strategy. For instance, understanding why an employee behaves a certain way (as seen in the case of Vikki) can lead to a more constructive and empathetic resolution.
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Positive Reinforcement and Private Discussions: The article emphasizes the importance of beginning discussions with positive reinforcement, maintaining confidentiality during reprimands, and ending on a positive note or offering rewards to maintain team morale.
Overall, the article underscores the nuanced aspects of effective management—highlighting the importance of empathy, communication skills, and a thorough understanding of employee behavior to resolve issues and foster a productive work environment.
